Paranoia Sets In

Sigh, I don't know what is wrong with me. Is it just me or is it true that all my friends are backing out on me. I don't know, I want answers. I want to know if I'm actually surrounded by true friends. A few true friends I can actually count on is Ray(Though we have stupid petty quarrels at times and we create a mountain out of a molehill on several minute issues, you're a trustworthy person, a person whom I can actually trust), Maxine(Albeit I knew you for a short time, you've earned my trust by giving constructive advices. Sometimes I do things to anger you and you do to =P, you're still very trustworthy, I trust you with my secrets.), Marlisa(My very best disturb partner who actually has the patience to put up with me, you rarely do things to annoy me, and when you do, it starts from me.). Are these all the people I can trust?
My school life isn't very good. I've no confidence in my weakest subject, Physics. Just took my Chinese test and I'd say that it didn't go very well. And I'm addicted to online games that I just can't break free from the hold these manipulative games have on me. People just don't bother understanding each other anymore. Its always "every man for himself". I mean what is going on with the world? Why are there so much conflicts, why can't people co-exist and live in harmony. Everyone has flaws, but some people just seem completely oblivious to these flaws. My friend, which I have no intention to disclose his name, has just taken a complete different attitude towards me. 3 years of friendship and suddenly, his every sentence drips with sarcasm, every single word is a snide remark, hitting back at me. I just don't know if I can actually trust him, I don't know if he is my true friend. I don't know.(Plenty of Internal Conflict within me at the moment, pardon me for that) Why is it so that people can be so hypocritical, so hypocritical that the entire society is now such a scary place to live in? Recurring images of my friends and me keep flashing inside my head. Is this a premonition? Is my life at its peak or at its abyss? My future is completly bleak to me, I can't see anything. I don't know anything. My Final Year Examinations is going to be a complete washout. Why am I such a failure? I don't know. I need answers, I want answers. Someone please help me. Lord Please help me, Please watch over me. Please help me tide over this perilous period of my life.

Thank you to everyone in 3Unity.

Well, finally decided to start blogging after a long break. Well, I do not want to be part of the class disputes anymore, it's really been getting irksome and laborious. I've decided to take a neutral stand against everyone in this class. Hopefully it lasts. No more open wars or whatsoever from me.
I really do understand why people are so sick of the never-ending disputes in our class, finally experienced the melancholy and detriment experienced by the targets of these brutal and malicious verbal attacks. I'm really elated and gratified that someone yanked that viel away from my eyes to see the actually clear and sharp personality which doesn't prove to be so bovine and prosaic anymore. This post is written in gratitude to everyone who was trying to change the unknown efficacy of this seemingly "eternal" conflict and dispute.
I'll bear a neutral attitude if not positive disposition towards every single individual in the class, thus contributing to the travails towards a united class, living up to our name of 3UNITY.


...
After today, it was a completely different outlook I had to the class compared to that of what I had when I entered school this morning. It was a complete bleak day for me in school, until I realised that I actually have friends that care and people who are particularly petty and spread whatever you tell them. It's a great day today and I think I've grown closer to the class by abit and its such a wonderful day. When I left school today, I was thinking to myself, "If tomorrow will be as good as today, I'll anticipate coming to this institute of learning everyday!" Hopefully school is as good as today tomorrow! =)